Episode II: The Quest (Part II)
In the last episode, Jedi knight Qui-Gon Jinn saved a performer named Ben Kenobi from Skaarla, a ruthless and now dead bounty hunter. Qui-Gon told Kenobi that he was a production assistant and wanted to cast him in the lead role of a new movie. Kenobi agreed, and as the two men were leaving an alleyway, they were confronted by two bounty hunter friends of Skaarla.
"Going somewhere, Kenobi?", asks a rather ugly cyclops-like creature.
"Gonthra! Hey what's up, man?" Kenobi nervously grins as he looks over at the other creature, who's even uglier. "Hey, Muhiire... what are you guys doing here?"
"We're looking for Skaarla. You seen her?", Gonthra asks Kenobi as he eyes Qui-Gon.
"Well yeah, I saw her earlier this evening. Why?" Kenobi nervously lights a cigarette as Qui-Gon looks intently at both creatures.
"She said she had some business to take care of with you... I guess she got a little careless", snarls Muhiire as he slowly reaches for his blaster. "Too bad. Guess I'll just have to collect the bounty for your pretty hide myself."
Qui-Gon steps forward. "Look, we don't want any trouble. Leave now, before your fate is the same as your friend's". Gonthra looks over to Muhiire. They suddenly draw their blasters and fire, but Qui-Gon deflects the blasts, striking them down instead. The Jedi grabs Kenobi and they start running, as a crowd gathers around the smoldering bounty hunters.
They run for several blocks before entering a noisy bar playing disco music. "We should be okay for a while in here", Qui-Gon tells Kenobi while cautiously looking around. Kenobi stares at Qui-Gon. "Well, it looks like Skaarla wasn't the only one who didn't know about Meshiin's change of heart. Maybe we'd better go see him, just to make sure..." Kenobi is grabbed by an overly excited blond in a blue dress. "Hi, Ben! I didn't know you were working tonight! C'mon and dance with me!"
"Uh, this really isn't a good... " Kenobi protests, but the woman is persistent and stuffs money into his shirt. She begins to dance and Kenobi joins her, as her friends cheer them on.
Qui-Gon shakes his head in disbelief, wondering if this guy might be a little too cheeky for his Jedi quest. His concerns are heightened when Kenobi suddenly jumps up on the stage and starts going crazy. The women in the crowd are equally going nuts, as he starts going through his dance routine.
Qui-Gon notices one woman getting particularly excited. He walks over to interview her. "So, you actually like this guy?" The woman looks at Qui-Gon like he's crazy. "Are you kidding?! He's the hottest dancer here! I've never missed one of his shows! I'm just lucky to be here, 'cause he wasn't even supposed to be dancing tonight!"
Qui-Gon looks bewildered, then disgusted. He realizes that he's made a big mistake - this guy will never get past Yoda's snooty scrutiny.
Qui-Gon angrily storms out of the bar, just as Kenobi turns to see him. "Hey Qui-Gon! Wait up!", Kenobi yells, as he jumps off the stage and squeezes past his rowdy fans, catching the money they're throwing at him. After running outside, Kenobi pauses and searches for Qui-Gon, who's disappearing around a corner.
"Qui-Gon, wait!" Kenobi runs hard to catch-up with Qui-Gon, who has stopped. "Hey man, you leaving without me?!"
"Look, I've been thinking. Maybe I was wrong about you. I don't think you can handle this part afterall." Qui-Gon turns away as Kenobi grabs his arm.
"Wait, wait, hold up! What do you mean I can't handle this part? I can do anything! You saw me back there. You saw how I was working that room, controlling that room."
Qui-Gon frowns. "Yes, I DID see you back there." He pulls his arm away from Kenobi.
"Well, that crowd's pretty tough. Last year they almost killed a guy just because he couldn't dance!"
Qui-Gon looks at him in disbelief.
"That's right. The guy stank. Stank bad! I just couldn't take it any longer, so I started shouting 'Stone Him!' I only stopped that mob from finishing him off because he was my brother. I said 'Owen man, you need to stick to moisture farming because you really suck as a dancer'. And do you know he had the nerve to get angry, and hasn't spoken to me since! Last time I heard, he was living on some little remote, dried-up planet. I might just go look him up someday... maybe."
Qui-Gon, disgusted, turns and starts walking away. Kenobi follows him and starts pleading his case again.
"Look, you can't just desert me like this! I appreciate your saving me from Skaarla and friends, but one of those bounty hunters you zapped comes from a family of bounty hunters. The theme of their next family reunion is gonna be 'Killing Kenobi'. I'll be dead meat, once one of them catches up with me. Help me, Qui-Gon Jinn... you're my only hope!"
Qui-Gon keeps walking, unaffected by Kenobi's plea. "Don't worry. A hustler like you can take care of himself. Or maybe some of your lady friends can protect you. They seem to be a regular bunch of Amazons, ready to do your bidding as long as you keep dancing for them. Anyway, I've wasted enough time with you already. I've still got a mission to complete and not much time in which to do it!"
Obi-Wan stops in his tracks. "Fine! Go ahead then!" He begins to cry. "Don't worry about me. I'm already dead. You might fight like a Jedi, but you certainly don't have the heart of one!"
Qui-Gon turns and glares at Kenobi.
Kenobi stops whimpering and walks up to Qui-Gon. He studies his face intently. "Master Jedi Qui-Gon Jinn. I knew something wasn't quite right about your story. No movie production guy can slice and dice with a lightsaber the way you do. And now your angry feelings have betrayed you. You're here for some purpose that has nothing to do with a movie. Something that has to do with your being a Jedi knight. Some sort of quest."
Qui-Gon sighs. "I sensed that you might be strong in the Force. At first, I thought that you were just being a little smart-a**. Actually, I still think that you're a little smart-a**. But your ability to read my feelings do prove that you have that certain Jedi trait." Qui-Gon places his hand on Kenobi's shoulder. "Look, I'm not really working for Meeshin -- I've never even met him before. I came here to find someone I could train to be my Jedi apprentice. I thought you might be the one, until you went nuts back there in that bar..."
Suddenly, bullets whiz by Qui-Gon's head. "Kenobi, DROP!!" He grabs Kenobi and they both fall to the ground. They look up to see a panicked crowd screaming and running for cover as a Tusken Raider approaches, aiming his rifle at the two on the ground. The Raider fires repeatedly but keeps missing, since he's a terrible shot. Finally, an angry Qui-Gon jumps up. "Enough of this crap!" He uses his lightsaber to deflect one of the bullets back to the Raider, shattering his rifle. The Raider is quite pissed and makes a rude gesture to Qui-Gon, who becomes even more incensed. "What the...?!", growls the angry Jedi as he walks toward the Raider, who takes-off running.
Kenobi walks over to Qui-Gon. "Great! That was Muhiire's cousin. I told you they'd come after me. You have no choice, Master Qui-Gon. Your Jedi conscience will not permit you to abandon me here to die." Kenobi takes out another cigarette and lights it.
"Fine! I'll take you with me then. But I'm warning you -- you screw-up just one time and you'll wish that Raider hadn't missed". Then Qui-Gon slaps the cigarette out of Kenobi's mouth. "And no more of that crap, either. From now on, you're gonna be living the austere, disciplined life of a Jedi. Now c'mon let's get outta here." Qui-Gon turns and walks away as Kenobi frowns and sticks his tongue out at him. The Jedi turns around and stares suspiciously, just as the young man cheekily grins back at him. The Jedi rolls his eyes, turns and walks away, with Kenobi following close behind.
Next Time...
Episode III:
Judgement Day
Episode I
Episode III
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